Welcome!

Welcome to Poetry Critical, an online poetry workshop. To post your own poetry, rate that of others, or start a new thread on the message board, you'll need to create a user id by typing a name and password in the box above and hitting 'New User'. If you just want to critique or jump into the discussion, however, you can do that without logging in by typing your comment in the box under each poem or post.

$567

$600

Donation Drive: Pay for first year of hosting

Random Poem:

Hospital Wings
FangzOfFire
And after the accident	1
you left him	2
in the blankest room of the hospital	3
with the snake of IV	4
biting into his wrist,	5
and the oxygen mask	6
suffocating him,	7
and the bedpan	8
for subtle humiliation.	9

With him you left	10
the guilty clouds	11
so you could swallow the sunshine	12
in your selfishness,	13
hoping the hot sun	14
would cover the coldness inside.	15

You sent him letters	16
with postcards of his favorite places,	17
assuring him you'd visit	18
and hide him away;	19
you could run away together	20
to a place that cost thirty-five cents	21
and the sunshine	22
would pour between his lips.	23

But the blankness	24
blinded his eyes,	25
and the IV	26
numbed his fingers,	27
and the mask	28
smothered your perfume.	29

Your letters were dead to him,	30
like the sunshine	31
that left your heart unthawed.	32

And the line	33
of the monitor	34
pressed as flat	35
as the two-dimensional walls	36
and his silence	37
was as blank as his eyes	38
absorbing the clouds	39
you'd left behind for him	40
to asphyxiate.	41

And his soul departed,	42
a ghostly peacock,	43
leaving a pale memory	44
of that fateful night	45
in a feather	46
on your nightstand.	47

Before evaporation	48
he perches on your heart,	49
heavy with your guilt,	50
so leveling the line.	51

And blankness	52
blinds your eyes,	53
and you shed	54
your last feather,	55
and you inhale	56
the clouds.	57

And after the accident,	58
he left you,	59
in the dark of the hospital	60
with poison in your veins	61
and a wreath of pollution	62
leaking into your lungs	63
and the sickly smell of urine	64
dwindling on your tongue	65
and a halo of storm clouds	66
so you	67
couldn't	68
fly.	69
(comment on this poem)

poetry critical

online poetry workshop

Welcome!

Random Poem: