poetry critical

online poetry workshop

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  • poems: 30,934 (10,099 active)
  • comments: 218,537
  • ratings: 84,853
  • average rating: 7.3
  • forum posts: 145,086
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Welcome!

Welcome to Poetry Critical, an online poetry workshop. To post your own poetry, rate that of others, or start a new thread on the message board, you'll need to create a user id by typing a name and password in the box above and hitting 'New User'. If you just want to critique or jump into the discussion, however, you can do that without logging in by typing your comment in the box under each poem or post.

 
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Random Poem:

Locks
Linnac

Though all who see me,
 1
Spear my heart,
 2
Inside the flesh,
 3
Is a work of art.
 4
 
 
No one looks
 5
Beyond the skin,
 6
Or the bloodlines
 7
Of my kin.
 8
 
 
I wear a gown
 9
So tattered and old,
 10
Of course there’s a story
 11
Yet to be told.
 12
 
 
It tells of the pain
 13
Prejudice has wrought,
 14
But I’m silent,
 15
No words I’ve been taught.
 16
 
 
All they see
 17
Is a peasant girl,
 18
To whom the men jeer,
 19
“Give us a whirl!”
 20
 
 
But I know no dances,
 21
I won’t understand,
 22
I’m trapped in a very
 23
Unforgiving land.
 24
 
 
To those who’d listen,
 25
My story, I can’t share,
 26
I whisper no disappointment,
 27
I can’t say, “It’s not fair.”
 28
 
 
Hunger often claims me,
 29
I dwindle to a shell,
 30
I have nothing,
 31
And I’m quite unwell.
 32
 
 
These are harsh times,
 33
Everyone scurries by,
 34
Not caring about the girl
 35
Who is trying not to cry.
 36
 
 
No one considers
 37
The sorrow in my eyes,
 38
Eyes which stare blankly
 39
At the smoky skies.
 40
 
 
I wish I could form
 41
Some words on my lips,
 42
But my swollen tongue
 43
Only stutters and trips.
 44
 
 
I see the happy faces
 45
And I’m muted by shock,
 46
A shop over there,
 47
With a broken lock.
 48
 
 
I sneak onto the cobbles
 49
In the dead of night,
 50
A boy creeps by
 51
Stealing a kite.
 52
 
 
As a pigeon pecks the ground,
 53
And a rat scampers near,
 54
I feel a foreboding,
 55
Utter sense of fear.
 56
 
 
I’m close to the Thames,
 57
So it smells like waste,
 58
And I can’t rid myself
 59
Of that awful taste.
 60
 
 
My mind went blank,
 61
As it often did,
 62
And a horse cantered by
 63
Ridden by a kid.
 64
 
 
His father catches up
 65
Short of breath,
 66
I try the door,
 67
But feel like death.
 68
 
 
It is locked
 69
By those new keyhole things,
 70
I’d just missed the chance
 71
To steal some rings.
 72
 
 
The boy laughs
 73
And rides up to me,
 74
“Hi, I’m hungry,
 75
Want to come for tea?”
 76
 
 
And just like that,
 77
A whole new world
 78
Of rosy cheeks
 79
And hair that’s curled.
 80
 
 
The boy was nice,
 81
Said he’d been watching me,
 82
Everyday,
 83
He rode up to see.
 84
 
 
He said I was pretty,
 85
Then asked me my name,
 86
When I mimed a sore throat,
 87
He thought it was a shame.
 88
 
 
His parents were nice
 89
And his butler astute,
 90
They gave me speaking lessons,
 91
But I chose to be mute.
 92
 
 
At least I could understand
 93
And mime to make him smile,
 94
His gorgeous flavoured name was
 95
Peter John Tyle.
 96
 
 
He was my Peter,
 97
And he called me Jane,
 98
After a woman
 99
Who may be insane.
 100
 
 
He said I was a joker,
 101
He could read it in my heart,
 102
Finally someone
 103
Who knew my part.
 104
 
 
We grew up together
 105
And no words did I say,
 106
But he knew I loved him,
 107
So that was OK.
 108
 
 
He pierced inside me
 109
And took out my soul,
 110
Bonded it to his,
 111
That took its toll!
 112
 
 
We would live together,
 113
I’d be Peter’s bride,
 114
Until we found out
 115
His parents had lied.
 116
 
 
They had arranged
 117
That he wed another,
 118
My heart split,
 119
I could love no other.
 120
 
 
He looked at me,
 121
Apologising,
 122
I never knew
 123
Of this cunning devising.
 124
 
 
Just then,
 125
My whole world crumbled
 126
And out of the room,
 127
I haplessly bumbled.
 128
 
 
Awake that night,
 129
I lay on my pillows,
 130
The tears fell silently
 131
Like those of weeping willows’.
 132
 
 
A glimmer of light,
 133
A candle was aflame!
 134
Peter then whispered,
 135
His parents were to blame.
 136
 
 
I hadn’t heard the door open,
 137
Not a draft of wind,
 138
And the relief I felt
 139
I kept quite tinned.
 140
 
 
He told me to dress quickly
 141
And come with him,
 142
He then told me,
 143
We were risking life and limb.
 144
 
 
I felt,
 145
A surge of pride,
 146
Running away,
 147
My lover at my side.
 148
 
 
And in the moonlight,
 149
We stole his parents’ gold,
 150
He cautioned the danger,
 151
I didn’t need to be told.
 152
 
 
Outside,
 153
A carriage awaited,
 154
I could see that this escape
 155
Had been heavily contemplated.
 156
 
 
And so we got on,
 157
His hand clasped in mine,
 158
He asked how I felt,
 159
I mimed feeling fine.
 160
 
 
Then he leaning forward,
 161
So his smile I wouldn’t miss,
 162
And like in the fairy tales,
 163
He granted me true love’s first kiss.
 164
 
 
He took me in his arms,
 165
A bump broke us apart,
 166
And my first words were,
 167
“You’ve unlocked my heart!”
 168

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